I’m a fraud!!!  Warning!!!…  If you are going to proceed any further you must realize that I spend a large portion of my time pretending to be something that I am not.

What I Lie About….

How much I love my job – I get paid more than I should.  I have great perks and I do very little for the money that I earn.  I get paid well above 6 figures and I have around 6 months off, per year.  While I am at work my goal is to spend at least 4 hours per day 7 days per week working on my personal business.  Not the usual situation, I know, and a fairly good situation to have when starting a new business, the internet could be better and I am working on that.  At my job I am expected to be in charge, I am expected to be growing someone else’s company and I am expected to be engaged.  I take pride in being good at my job so I try to live up to all of these expectations but the truth is, I hate it.  I hate the work, I like very few of the people and I am not at all passionate about what it is that I have to sell.  For many people this would be a dream job and for a short while it was for me too, but as with everything, it got old.  I now find myself in a situation where it would sabotage my current job to spill the beans about all of my entrepreneurial activities.  So, I lie.  I have to be someone different from who I really am while I am at  work.  I find that the longer I live this lie of being inauthentic the more of a struggle it becomes.

I know what I am doing – I ain’t got a clue.  I show up everyday and try to make something happen.  I try to learn at least one things per day and apply this to my business.  The truth is Twitter still doesn’t make much sense and I have never bought a Facebook add.  But I keep pushing on.  I am one chapter ahead of my customers or prospective customers.  I am constantly looking for solutions and trying to bring these solutions to others.  The truth is that I am trying to fake it until I make it because that is how many success stories are born.

I write for a blog about homeschooling, most of my how-tos are based on my failures in this arena not my successes.

I constantly struggle with my fear of failure because I have yet to make it in the start-up world, yet I push on, realizing that the best way to succeed is to continue moving forward.  I attempt to fine tune my thinking by forcing positive through my thick skull instead of letting the negative thinking take over.

So if you are reading this looking for a success story. I ain’t it, at least not yet.  I embody the struggle that a family man with responsibilities has to deal with in order to get a business off the ground.

“The best time to plant a tree was 20 years ago, the next best time is now” Zen Proverb